A couple weeks ago, I capped off another long week of traveling around the region with one more Operator visit right in my backyard. Given the proximity to my house and my determination to spend a little extra time with my kids, I asked if any of them wanted to join me. The promise of fries for their afternoon snack was reason enough. Hands raised, Bobby and Margaret ran out the door and into my car.
As we drove down Fifth, Bobby turned to Margaret and said, 'take my lead. I'm a pro at these meetings.' She nodded her head, subservient to the expert.
I chuckled in the front, but it was the truth - Bobby was nothing less than a master at my McMeetings since spending a couple days with me, traveling to and from Dayton on business.
With my summer travel schedule and an increased sense of comfort in doing the job, I thought I could combine one-on-one time with my kids, teaching moments and work over their break. Turns out that I only got to do it with Bobby, but I'm glad it happened. We planned a trip to Dayton. 75% of the time we were on market visits to influence and enrich how my franchisees think about and drive their business. And the other 25% of the time, we were doing what Bobby wanted to do - tour the Airforce Museum and swim in the Marriott pool.
On the first day, Bobby visited three restaurants and three different franchisees with me. He tasted with discernment a lunch of nuggets and fries, and then our newest ice cream treat on his progressive fast food tour of Dayton. He played in the bounds of two play places. He ensured marketing and merchandising elements were up, and that the Crew was promoting our latest value offering. He observed customers and their behaviors, relaying that one had said a bad word. He commented on cleanliness, food quality, service speed, and which operator he liked best. He sipped a Shirley Temple while I had a stronger drink with one of my leadership franchisees at the hotel bar. He listened as I called members of my team with guidance, coaching and ultimately direction. He absorbed snippets of how I talk about the business and influence my stakeholders. He got a slice of system politics and negotiations. And he looked out the window a lot, taking in the Ohio countryside, reflecting on how much of it I've seen.
At the hotel, he swam in the 1990's era indoor / outdoor pool. A total novelty to him that was met with initial fear, then fascination, then fun, especially as he paired up with another kid, just his age. Colton going into grade four in small town Indiana was an instant match for Bobby's zeal. For a couple hours, Colton and Bobby were best friends, watching planes fly overhead, playing with a nerf ball, seeing how high their cannonball splashes could reach, talking about their own personal war heroes - Colton's dad and Bobby's cousin Meghan.
The next day, Bobby was up with me at 5:30 AM to grab a coffee, work out, and start the work day. One more visit, and then it was his time - a three hour tour of the Airforce Museum, which might have been the most impressive museum I've experienced. In total, Bobby and I walked three miles through the history of aviation and the planes used in War World 2, the Korean War, Vietnam, and in the Middle East. There were also ICMBs and Air Force Ones. It was massive and mesmerizing, and Bobby soaked up every second of it, not wanting to leave.
On the way back home, we stopped in Mt. Vernon, Ohio to see a museum dedicated to all the toys that have ever been given out in kids meals. The founding father of this mecca, is one of my most senior operators in the region, celebrating 60 years with the brand next year, and one of the most gracious and genuinely kind people I've interacted with. Bobby was in awe looking through the generation of toys, some that I would have collected, some that he collected, others we hadn't seen before.
The way home from Mt. Vernon was off the interstate, on the windy and rural state roads reserved for the fiercest of road warriors. Bobby stared out the window for a lot of it, first at the farms and crops, then at the dramatic vistas along the stretch of 250 that runs through Tappan Lake. I asked what he thought about the past couple days - what he learned - what he thought about my job.
It was slow in coming. He remembered the names of the people we had met and could recite just about all of them. Bobby is a people person first and foremost - faces and names stick. He reflected on the museums. Total make his life moments. I reached for more though. 'Anything you learned in the conversations you overheard?' I lost him. He seemed stumped.
I helped him grasp the takeaways. 'Come on, buddy ... you've sat through conversations about marketing, real estate development, construction, franchise terms, carrying on the legacy of a family run business and the transfer of assets, finance, talent development, and operations. You heard me negotiate. You saw me stand tall next to taller businessmen. You listened as I navigated a crisis situation. You literally experienced the entire application of my MBA.'
'Oh ... yeah.'
I didn't stop. 'What else did you notice? How about the way I communicated with people? Did you notice something about every conversation I had?'
'You're good at them?'
'Okay ... well what else? What did I tell you going in.'
'You listened ... more than you talked?'
'That's right.'
He went back to looking at Ohio from the window. I could force the lessons learned, but I imagine he got what he wanted. Which was time with me and some tales that he would make taller as he returns to school next week.
I'm not as home as much as I want to be. I'm not there to shape popular household opinion of the state of my motherhood. And I often wonder how my kids perceive me. I'm their mom yes - a rock, a source of love and attention, a sounding board, their waffle maker on Saturday mornings. But do they grasp all the dimensions, all the roles I play, and the effort that comes from trying to juggle them? I wanted Bobby to see the angles of my job, the quick thinking and problem solving, the skills and tactics, the fact that a woman could have tough conversations with businessmen and come out with the upper hand. I wanted him to see that outside of being the mom I am at home, I'm a mom with a mission at work. I wanted him to know that I love and respect all the sides of my identity, that they are integral to who I am. I wanted him to realize how much I've got going on, that I'll never be a perfect mom, but I'm doing my best to do it all.
Despite the various dimensions of Bobby though, he is simple. Sure, he gets when I need to be gone, but his takeaway was that spending time with mom was awesome and that he wants to do it again.
At the end of another week of travel, on my favorite day of the week, I'm just fine with my kids walking down the stairs after they wake up to see their mom, as flatly and as squarely as they want to define me. Because like Bobby, they just want their rock, their source of love and attention, their sounding board, and their waffle maker. And I want them to know that I am their mom first and foremost, and that job will always take priority.
Lo.
