Resolving To Be On Time

Last year I quickly came up with a new year's resolution. I was in need of a bigger dose of public self-therapy, so I resolved to more diligently and thoughtfully contribute to The Early Riser. I would say that my 65 entries (some better than others) was a testament to a successful resolution, one that I'm proud of, especially after too many years of Lenten fasting failures and new year's resolutions that only lasted two weeks.  

So with newfound motivation, I want to start 2011 with a resolution. On January 1, Peter picked his as I struggled to find mine. I first thought about eating healthier, but with icing already eliminated from my diet, that meant cutting out the wine and chocolate and that's no fun. I thought about praying more, but I thought that shouldn't count, because I should be doing that already. Today, I came up with it though. After a day repairing my own delinquent tendencies, I created a great resolution. In 2011, I'm resolving to be more on time.

Now ... with that said, I would like to redefine the notion of "on time." "On time" to me means being where I'm supposed to be or doing what I'm supposed to do in a timely manner. Some things have a set deadline and expiration date. Other things don't and they require patience and the realization that you aren't necessarily in control.

I used to think "on time" meant five minutes early, being the first one there, and getting something done according to everyone else's timeline. Growing up, I used to pride myself on being punctual. No matter what, no matter where I was the one that made other people produce an apologetic "were you waiting long?" I always said, "No, not at all." But my uncontrollable facial expressions whined, yes, actually I was waiting for like twenty minutes, I looked like a complete loser, and I'd really appreciate it if you NEVER did that again! At the same time, I was the one out of my friends and family who was a little late for the big stuff - the last one to "become a woman", to have a boyfriend, to get a "real" job and to get married.

Over the past five years, I've gone through a dramatic shift in punctuality. I seem to be late for the things I can't be late for, and early for the things I'm not ready for. On a daily basis, I'm running 10 to 15 minutes late; monthly five to ten days late; and yearly more like three to four months late for the you-need-to-be-there-on-time stuff. For instance, today I took my emissions test so I could renew my four-month expired license plate. That should have been done on time, a looong time ago. All the while, I kept pushing things that life wasn't ready for - when am I going to get married, when am I going to have kids, when am I going to make the big bucks?

So here's my resolution - to go back to the old ways - to be five-minutes early for the things that demand absolute punctuality - meetings for work, mass, license plate renewals, bill payments, weddings and other things that are going to proceed with or without me. And to be patient and okay waiting for the things that will happen in due time, when all parties are ready to participate. Also ... to never, ever, EVER keep my sister waiting this year. I think that I'll be a whole lot less stressed out if I keep this resolution close at heart and hand.

When I was young, at this point in the evening, I would have called my Mom and asked, "where are you?! Dinner's ready!" But with a new resolve, and the mature knowledge that dinner isn't going anywhere and will be just as good simmering a little while longer, I'm patiently waiting for Peter's timely arrival home and a very flexible "dinner time." Wow, I'm starting this year off right!

Tonight it's a little pork and sauerkraut celebration to ring in the New Year.

Lo.